


Hot-Blooded Bodyguard

by Happy_Ocelot



Category: Naruto
Genre: Blank Period, Crack, Hokage Hatake Kakashi, Post-Chapter 699 (Naruto), Post-Fourth Shinobi War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:35:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28283316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Happy_Ocelot/pseuds/Happy_Ocelot
Summary: "The wheelchair was a weapon of guts and mass destruction."Kakashi becomes the Sixth Hokage and asks Guy to be his bodyguard for the upcoming Five Kage Summit.One-shot. Post-War / Kakashi & Guy friendship / Team Guy.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi & Maito Gai | Might Guy
Comments: 7
Kudos: 44





	Hot-Blooded Bodyguard

**Author's Note:**

> I just had a mental image of Kakashi and Guy travelling the world, with Guy throwing his wheelchair at bad guys, and so I wrote this.
> 
> And apparently Fukamaru is a Pokemon (Gible in the English version). I didn't know that when I was writing this, but it was so funny that I decided to keep it.
> 
> Purple Lightning is the jutsu that Kakashi invented after losing the Sharingan and being unable to use Chidori/Raikiri, for those who don't know.
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy and review. :)

Kakashi divided his life into eras.

The earliest parts of his life were split between the eras "Before Father's Death" and "After Father's Death." It was in the "After Father's Death" era that Kakashi understood the importance of being a perfect shinobi, and the dire consequences that followed if one did not live up to expectations. Consequences such as the ridicule, humiliation and suicide that befell his father Sakumo. Kakashi was nothing if not a prodigy, and always learned from the mistakes of others around him, so that he wouldn't have to repeat them.

The lesson from this era was "Those who don't follow the rules are trash." For well over a decade, this was Kakashi's motto, his ninja way, and he followed it as though his life depended on it. Because his life _did_ depend on it.

The next era was "After Obito's Death." When they'd first met, Kakashi _hated_ everything Obito stood for. His chronic lateness, his incompetence, the way he wore his heart on his sleeve. Obito was a crybaby ninja and ninjas weren't _supposed to cry_. Their lives depended on completing missions successfully, not giving piggyback rides to old ladies and shattering every rule of the shinobi code of conduct to tiny little pieces.

Then came the Battle of Kannabi Bridge and a new era of Kakashi's life. As he tearfully bid farewell to Obito's half-crushed body, he was forced to amend his ninja way.

Obito passed on his eye and his dreams to Kakashi.

The lesson from _this_ era was "Those who don't follow the rules are trash. But those who abandon their friends are worse than trash."

That was Kakashi's new ninja way.

Now, the morning sun of another era was rising in Kakashi's life.

The era of the Rokudaime.

Kakashi had never dreamed of becoming the Hokage. That was Obito's dream, and later on, Naruto's dream. But Obito was his eye and they would see the future together. Kakashi would take the hat, and he would become a great Hokage. He would do it for Obito, Rin, Minato-sensei, Naruto, and everyone who had ever depended on him.

However, he couldn't do it alone. He needed advisers. He needed every single one of Konoha's ninja and civilian population to help him.

Most importantly, for the upcoming Five Kage Summit in Kirigakure, he needed a bodyguard.

* * *

Kakashi would be the first Hokage since the Sandaime to attend a Five Kage Summit. The Yondaime had barely been Hokage for a year before the Kyuubi attack had brutally cut his time short. The Godaime had been in a coma during the infamous summit in the Land of Iron, when the Fourth Ninja War had been declared.

Now, as the Rokudaime, it was Kakashi's turn to represent Konoha before the Five Great Nations. He had completed all the preparations and was just about ready to embark on his journey to the Mist Village, but for a small hitch.

The Kage were allowed a maximum of two bodyguards for the Five Kage Summit. Kakashi had already decided on Shizune-san as his first bodyguard. As Tsunade-sama's apprentice and adviser, she would definitely be an invaluable asset for diplomacy as well as combat.

The problem was the second bodyguard. Kakashi racked his mind for anyone suitable and was at a dead end.

Kurenai would have been a good choice, but she was busy with her infant daughter Mirai, and would be unavailable for a few more years. Most of the jounin were dead, or were out on missions to supplement the village's income.

Kakashi didn't want to burden his colleagues' students nor his own with such a task so soon after the war. They needed time to rest and recover and enjoy the remainder of their adolescence before getting thrust into heavyweight roles. Burned-out ninjas needed to be avoided at all costs.

Kakashi strolled through the streets of Konoha, his head buried in an Icha Icha book. No one ever believed him when he told them, but Jiraiya-sama's novels always helped him clear his head and think. Everyone always thought he only enjoyed reading the explicit descriptions of Nori and Wakame's true love, but they were wrong! Jiraiya-sama was a thoughtful writer and his books always included important lessons like –

"Did you hear what happened at the hospital yesterday, Jintaro?"

"Oh, you mean the antics of the nutcase with the huge eyebrows and his student with the bigger eyebrows?" laughed a mustachioed fruit merchant. "Yeah."

His pimply, balding customer shook his head. "Who the hell says they'll do a thousand sit-ups when they're in a wheelchair?"

"I heard from my mother that he had no ability for ninjutsu or genjutsu when he was a kid. Still doesn't."

"How was he even allowed to become a ninja?"

"Dunno. Maybe his family was close to the Sandaime."

"Yeah, and look what happens when you let incompetent people become shinobi. You get your leg smashed to pieces when a real fight happens."

Irritation licked the insides of Kakashi's stomach. What did these two idiots know about Guy? Did they know that he was a taijutsu master? That he surpassed a genius like Kakashi through sheer guts? Guy kicked in Madara's rib-cage. He almost single-handedly finished off the strongest ninja other than Senju Hashirama. There was another vital lesson Kakashi had learned from the "After Obito's Death" era: Guy always, _always_ looked out for his students and his friends.

Guy was a...great choice for a bodyguard. He always had Kakashi's back and a bad leg wouldn't stop him from continuing to do so.

That was one of the lessons in Jiraiya-sama's books. A ninja was someone with the guts to never give up.

Guy wouldn't give up, so he was still a ninja.

Kakashi's eyes narrowed in determination as he set off towards the hospital.

* * *

"Guy-sensei! Here is your tea. The doctor says that the herbal mixture will act as a painkiller!"

"Thank you so much, Lee! You're the most youthful student I could ask for! How was your training today?"

"It went amazingly well, Guy-sensei. I did a hundred handstands around the village this morning while Tenten threw knives at me!"

"That's my boy! After I am discharged, I will join you! Together, we can do two hundred handstands around the village while Tenten throws knives at us!"

"Guy-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Shut up, you airheads!"

Kakashi paused at the hospital room door, watching in amusement at the scene that unfolded before his eyes. Guy was seated on the bed with a cup of tea in his hands, wearing a light green hospital uniform, while a very hyper Lee and a very irate Tenten were sitting next to him.

Although it had been over a year since since Guy had sustained his supposedly career-ending leg injury, Guy still insisted on doing "warm-ups" with Lee every morning (and often a begrudging Tenten). Guy just refused to acknowledge his body's limits and he'd done a few handstands too many and ended up in the hospital _again_.

Kakashi couldn't fault him for this, because he too believed that Guy had absolutely no limits. Watching him open the Eighth Gate of Death and almost kill Madara in his Ten Tails Jinchuuriki form with no ninjutsu whatsoever tended to do that to most people.

Guy glanced in his direction, his eyes lighting up when he saw his beloved eternal rival.

"Kakashi! What brings you here today, my friend? Do you want a rivalry battle? We're still tied 50-50. Shall we play rock, paper, scissors?"

"He came to bring flowers, Guy-sensei," Tenten pointed out in a tired voice, gesturing towards the bouquet in Kakashi's hands.

"Yes, Guy, I just dropped by to see how you've been doing. I've been wanting to visit for a while, but with the Five Kage Summit preparations, I've been swamped."

"Oh, I appreciate your gesture, Kakashi! You're the best rival I could ask for – "

"Also, I came to request something of you," Kakashi broke in before Guy could give a speech about youth and springtime.

"Yes, my rival?"

"I heard from Tsunade-sama that you'll be released in two days. I'd really appreciate it if you could accompany me to the summit as my bodyguard," Kakashi said.

Tenten looked at him skeptically. "Kakashi-sensei, Guy-sensei is in a wheelchair. How will he – "

"OF COURSE, KAKASHI. I WOULD LOVE TO BE YOUR BODYGUARD!" Guy-sensei bellowed, giving Tenten a near heart attack.

"Thank you so much, Guy. I have complete faith in you," said Kakashi earnestly.

Tenten got up off the floor, where she had fallen in shock due to Guy's high-decibel exclamations.

"You say that, sensei, but the summit's in Kirigakure this time. You'll have to cross the ocean to get there, and you'll be seasick," Tenten said in a gleefully sadistic voice. She was still miffed about the damage to her eardrums from a minute ago.

Guy turned pale in horror.

Kakashi smiled angelically.

"No backing out, Guy."

* * *

" _Blergh. Gahhh. Ulp."_

Guy was as green as his jumpsuit, his wheelchair swaying along with the waves, clutching a metal pail filled with vomit. Shizune gave him a sympathetic glance.

"Guy-san, the journey is only for a while longer. We'll be reaching Kirigakure in half an hour."

Guy gave no indication that he heard her, but continued to stare forlornly at his lost lunch.

"Just take it easy, Guy. Once we reach the village, you can lie down until the summit starts," Kakashi said reassuringly.

Soon enough, the boat arrived at the Village Hidden in the Mist. The fog that had blanketed the sky for the past three days had formed an impenetrable soup around the ninja town.

Guy cried out in relief as they finally disembarked and Shizune rolled his wheelchair over the wooden ramp.

Kakashi squinted as he tried to take in the scenery of the Mist Village. It was impossible. Fog, fog, fog everywhere. He was already feeling homesick for sweet, bright, sunny Konoha, with its narrow winding dirt paths, hawkers making a racket, with plum and cherry trees in full bloom. The Land of Water seemed to only be a silent foggy wasteland. He supposed that years of civil war and the decimation of the shinobi ranks had killed the joy in the place.

Kakashi recalled his few meetings with the Fifth Mizukage, a woman with auburn hair, piercing green eyes and a kind, elegant smile. She had expressed those same sentiments with a somber shake of her head. Her voice was pained as it described the horrors of the Bloody Mist era and hardened in resolve as she swore to shine a beacon of light into Kirigakure's eternal mist.

In spite of his homesickness and the dreariness of the Mist Village, Kakashi felt a thrill of excitement. He was going to meet his senpai among the Five Kage. Whether it was unruly Raikage A, teenage ex-Jinchuuriki Gaara, Onoki of the eternal back pains, or calm, collected and mysterious Mei, they were an extremely motley and interesting bunch.

Where would the masked, perpetually late, Icha Icha series loving Kakashi fit in?

* * *

_Ugh, this is so boring._

Kakashi was determined to do his best as the Sixth Hokage of Konoha. The droning of Mifune's successor was making it difficult, though. He stared at the handsome mahogany table, counting every splinter he could find. He momentarily glanced up.

Gaara caught his eye and smiled sympathetically. They'd all read up beforehand on the details of this joint trade deal that the Five Great Nations would ratify together, the first significant deal since the end of the Fourth Ninja War. It was surprisingly simple and easy to grasp, allowing free and legal trade of low-grade weapons throughout the Hidden Villages by authorized dealers. Kakashi crossed his fingers that all future treaties would be this way.

But while he respected the samurai Mifune greatly, why did he have to send such a long-winded person to take his place at the Five Kage Summit? All this talk about peace and unity and friendship was starting to bore him. For Kakashi, actions spoke louder than words. They'd all been comrades-in-arms in the last war and no one needed to hear boring speeches to confirm that.

It looked like he wasn't alone in feeling this way. The Raikage's bodyguard and younger brother, Killer B, was humming tonelessly under his breath, while the Raikage himself was drumming on the conference table. The Tsuchikage Onoki kept shifting uncomfortably in his hard wooden chair. He would probably need to see a chiropractor after the summit was over. Meanwhile Kankuro and Temari were surreptitiously playing rock, paper, scissors with Kurotsuchi and Akatsuchi, as the oblivious samurai continued lecturing on.

Only the Mizukage Mei, seated adjacent to Kakashi, seemed to be seriously paying attention to the tedious speech. Her auburn bun bobbed as she nodded and studiously took notes. Her bodyguards were Chojuro, the shy swordsman who'd been her pick at the last summit, along with a cloaked man who leered behind her.

The Mizukage's new bodyguard….Hmm. Kakashi's wandering mind seized on the new face. With his black hair shorn in a buzz cut, ghostly white skin, jagged teeth, and rotund features, he looked more like a great white shark than a human. He also carried a sword that looked more like a chainsaw. Why did _all_ of the Mist ninja swordsmen have jagged teeth? Where did Mei find this guy? Couldn't she have gotten a better replacement for her old bodyguard?

The creepy bodyguard looked directly at Kakashi and smiled like a predator that had scented blood.

The hair on the back of Kakashi's neck tingled. He glanced behind and saw only Shizune. Guy was _still_ recovering from his seasickness? How long did he need to lie down?

It was shaping up to be a very chilly night. Fog coated the floor and draped the air. Kakashi frowned as he wondered how Guy would be able to sleep in the bitterly cold temperature.

It was becoming very difficult to see.

Wait, it was becoming difficult to _see_? Kakashi shot to his feet. _He'd seen this jutsu before_.

"Don't move," a voice rasped. "Or I'll kill you right away."

The sharp edge of a chainsaw blade was pressed against his throat.

"What's going on?" yelled Onoki.

" _None of you move an inch."_

The room was an endless sea of white mist.

 _Hiding in Mist Jutsu_. The silent killing technique that Zabuza used to carry out his assassinations.

Kakashi's earlier uneasy gut feeling was correct after all. The Mizukage's new bodyguard was a spy.

"Fukamaru, what is the meaning of this?" Mei asked.

"Well, _Mizukage-sama_ , I simply cannot allow this summit to continue," said Fukamaru. "It would be bad for business."

"Bad for business?" Kakashi asked.

"Ah, yes, Hatake Kakashi. It's an honor to meet you. I've heard all about how you defeated Zabuza _twice_."

"Stop beating around the bush and get to the point," the Raikage roared. "Who are you and what do you want?"

"As I was saying, this trade deal cannot be allowed to become law. My business has greatly suffered," said Fukamaru. "I long for the return of the Village of Bloody Mist. The underground weapons business was booming back then. I became a millionaire."

Fukamaru turned a baleful eye towards Kakashi. "Then you, Kakashi, had to go and defeat Zabuza, signaling the end of the last of the Mist heroes. Our village became a laughingstock among the Underground. And after the War ended, this village had no use for me nor my weapons. Mizukage-sama would rather buy from Kumo or Iwa."

"The Bloody Mist era was a dark age for this village," said the Mizukage coldly. "Every man, woman, and child wept endless tears. If you truly loved your village, Fukamaru, you would be welcoming the return of peace and prosperity to Kirigakure."

"Such naive sentiments were what allowed me to easily infiltrate your ranks, Mizukage-sama. You really will run this village into the ground."

"Enough," snapped Gaara. "If you want a fight, we'll be more than happy to oblige. Don't underestimate the Five Kage."

"Oh, no, I have no grudge against you, Kazekage-sama. I simply want to ensure that the trade deal will be dropped," Fukamaru replied smoothly. "Except for you, Kakashi and Mei. You two die. I cannot tolerate the damage you have done to the Bloody Mist."

The chainsaw dug into his throat. Kakashi's mind ran through a million scenarios at the speed of light. He closed his eyes as he concentrated lightning chakra into his palm.

"Purple Lightning – "

"SEVERE LEAF HURRICANE!"

A blast of gale-force wind slammed through the room. To say that it was a gale was an understatement. No. It was just as its name indicated. It was a hurricane.

The Hiding in Mist Technique was blasted away, clearing up the room almost instantly.

In the midst of the beautiful green hurricane was Might Guy, who had somehow pulled off the technique with a bad leg and was currently doing a handstand, with his wheelchair's weight resting entirely on his good leg. Kakashi should've realized that Guy would practice wheelchair gymnastics during his "warm-ups" with Lee and Tenten.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING TO THE ROKUDAIME, YOU ROGUE?" Guy bellowed, then lost his balance and fell over, the wheelchair toppling to the side. "Oww."

Shizune rushed over. "Guy-san, I _told you_ that you shouldn't use that technique anymore."

"Nonsense, Shizune-san. My leg is merely being unyouthful today," he replied, standing up while grasping the arm of his wheelchair for support.

"Your leg isn't being unyouthful. It's _broken_ ," she snarled. There was nothing that ticked off the patient and kind Shizune more than _people who didn't follow her medical advice and did stupid things_.

Kakashi ran over to defuse the situation. "Now, now, let's not fight. Is your seasickness settled, Guy?"

"Who...the hell...are you?" asked Fukamaru. Apparently, he didn't know that it was rude to interrupt the Hokage.

Guy flashed one of those smiles that seemed to reflect sunlight and make everyone go temporarily blind. "I'm glad you asked. I am Konoha's Sublime Green Beast of Prey. The Hokage's one and only eternal rival!"

Kakashi sighed. Guy was going to something unnecessarily ridiculous now. He could feel it in his bones.

"I am," said the Sublime Green Beast of Prey, "Might Guy!"

He shot a thumbs-up at everyone in the room. Killer B gave a thumbs-up right back. Gaara groaned and hid his face in his hands.

Fukamaru just stared at Guy, gobsmacked for several long seconds, then burst out laughing.

"You're the Hokage's bodyguard? What the hell can you do with a broken leg?" he sneered, hefting his chainsaw. "You should have quit being a ninja before you got in over your head."

"I've been developing a new technique!" Guy exclaimed. "And you'll be the first one to experience it."

Guy picked up the wheelchair. A foreboding chill ran down Kakashi's spine.

"SEVERE WHEELCHAIR HURRICANE!"

Guy threw the heavy metal contraption at lightning speed. Fukamaru didn't even have time to duck.

The Five Kage Summit proceeded smoothly after that.

* * *

Kakashi smiled as he watched Fukamaru being dragged away by the security. He had received a concussion, a broken rib-cage, and a lumbar fracture.

The era of the Rokudaime had already delivered an invaluable lesson. The wheelchair was a weapon of guts and mass destruction.

It had also confirmed a lesson from previous eras.

Guy _always_ had his back.


End file.
